Be Patient
Sermon
Moving At The Speed Of Light
Second Lesson Sermons For Advent/Christmas/Epiphany
Not long ago I encountered the father of five boys. I asked him about his secret for parenting, "Never let them see the fear in your eyes," he said, as he reached for a picture of his fellows. Four of them appeared to be elementary school age and one a preschooler. The image showed them all decked out in war paint and two in camouflage clothing holding toy rifles. "The guns were from Grandma and Grandpa for Christmas," he said, rolling his eyes. "They're from Oregon," he added, as if that meant something. What a season!
We go to such great effort to make this a festive, exciting, meaningful, and memorable time. We create festivals at the church and festivities in the home. Each family and friend plans for an idiosyncratic expression of love. We create a charged concoction mixing Santa and shepherds, kings, cards, cookies, and Christ. And when we have the household tachometer revved close to meltdown, we proclaim: "We'll just have to be patient! Christmas is not for another ten days. I know it's exciting, but getting all worked up into a lather won't make it come any quicker. So, just be patient!"
It's Hard To Be Patient
But it's hard to be patient. Recently, a call came to the church. A woman choked with emotion reported, "Ray walked away from Day Care this morning." Immediately I knew she meant her husband, who is sinking into Alzheimer's and is in a wonderful day program in a community center. "It's a very busy street. He's headed west; he knows we live that way. They spotted him at the bank and the hamburger stand. It's been six hours. I'd have called earlier but I knew there was nothing we could do. Every time someone sees him, he's gone before the police get there. It's such a cold day. Do you think we could start the prayer chain?" Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
A young couple wants one thing most in life --to have a child. They wonder why God has not chosen to bless them with a pregnancy. Both are successful professionals but this brings little satisfaction. Now their marriage is beginning to suffer under the strain. Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
A family with several children sits in a fast food restaurant, Happy Meals don't bring happiness. Children's meals are mixed up among them and while a haggard dad tries to sort out whose meal is whose, the littlest one eats part of a meal which does not belong to him. Tempers flare. Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
I've heard it said, although I'm not sure it's true -- it's hard to be patient with your spouse. Socrates wrote, "By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher ... and that is a good thing for any man." We've heard it said that marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. It has also been suggested that marriage is not a word -- it's a sentence; that marriages are made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning.
It's hard to be patient with our vocation. Certain credentials are required, then experience, then a measure of luck and perseverance. Someone not particularly deserving is promoted to the job we want, or we receive damaging and unfair criticism. "Sometimes I think I'll just give it up and go become a ______."
It's hard to be patient with our health: that long illness we did not anticipate, medical treatment which does not work out, conflicting opinions, escalating expenses, wear and tear on our loved ones.
It's hard to be patient with our exercise program. I want to be like Mike, but I don't have time to be in the gym four hours a day. I thought the video said that if I did Stepmaster, I would have firm thighs. I knew that when I started using my ab cruncher my tummy would be tender for a few days, but I think I pulled something. Maybe I should go the doctor. It's hard to be patient.
"Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength" (but when you're waiting and weary, it's hard to be patient). James writes, "Be patient, therefore, brethren until the coming of the Lord. Behold the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient over it until it receives the early and the late rain. You also be patient. Establish your hearts...." Establish your hearts. James instructs us to allow God to do what God does -- to send the early and the late rain -- and to wait upon what God will do, expecting precious fruit.
Steven Covey in his highly acclaimed Seven Habits of Highly Effective People discusses the productive practice of having a time of idea planting, growth and development, and harvesting. He recommends a focus on things which are "important," and resisting the dominance of the "urgent." Things which are important include such things as building relationships, exercising, writing a personal mission statement, long range planning, preventative maintenance, preparation -- "all those things we know we need to do, but somehow we seldom get around to doing because they aren't 'urgent.' "1 Establish the heart, James writes. Make plans, form intentions in normal times to establish the heart. If we are patient, if we wait on the Lord (and focus on the important) in the ordinary days, then in the demanding seasons of planting and harvesting and in the precarious time of storm and darkness we will have hearts prepared and established enough to persevere.
Sometimes it is hard to be patient as a parent. Count to ten, sit on the sofa with a child, and discuss what happened. What went wrong? Why was it dangerous? Give the child an alternative, go to another room, start a new activity and sometimes the best decision for a parent is simply to walk away. With a little thought, whatever it is may not seem to be that important.
Sometimes it is hard to be patient as a parent ... but patience isn't always hard. And when patience is richly available, parents can plan to lead gently. Make a plan ahead of time to lead our children gently so we will know what to do in the midst of our frustration, tiredness, disappointment, and confusion.
Sometimes it's hard to be patient in a marriage -- establish the heart when patience is richly available. Take the Marriage Encounter quiz.2 Answer each question yes or no. "My spouse and I never have any trouble communicating (yes or no). When I make my spouse angry, I always know why (yes or no). I always know when my spouse is interested in making love (yes?). My spouse and I always agree on child-rearing techniques (?). My spouse and I are perfectly matched as far as sexual needs and desires (?). Work, TV, sports, children, and family never interfere with my ability to talk with or be with my spouse (?)." Is it hard to be patient even with your spouse? Establish your heart when patience is richly available.
However, when patience is worn thin, we travel through an emotional black hole where the familiar seems strange. We stumble in our homes as if in darkened rooms with the furniture in disarray. James' voice whispers, "The Lord is coming soon." This is precisely the time when our hearts are greatly opened to his coming.
The ancient Jewish parable tells of Baal Shem-Tov, the great rabbi who loved his people. If he sensed his people were in danger, he would depart to a place in the woods near a great tree, light a special fire, and say a mysterious prayer. And always without exception, the people he loved would be saved from danger. Magid of Mezritch became leader after Baal Shem-Tov passed on. As his teacher before him, whenever Magid sensed a danger for the people, he would go to a place in the woods near a great tree. He would say, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to light the special fire, but I know the mysterious prayer. Please let that be good enough." And it was, and the people were always saved from danger. The Rabbi Moshe-leib of Sasov came to lead the people when Magid passed on. And each time he heard the people were in danger, he would go to the place in the woods near the great tree. He would say, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to make the special fire, I do not know the mysterious prayer, but I know the place in the woods near this great tree. Please let this be good enough." And it was and the people were always saved from danger. Rabbi Israel of Rizhyn came to lead the people when Rabbi Moshe passed on and whenever the people were in danger, he didn't even get out of his armchair. He shrugged his shoulders and could only bow his head and pray, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to make the special fire. I do not know the mysterious prayer. I cannot find my way to the place in the woods near the great tree. All I know is the story, please let this be good enough." And it was, and his people were always saved.3
Dear Lord, sometimes when we are greatly challenged, greatly in need, in deep darkness, we forget the special place in the woods and sometimes even to pray. Be patient with us, as we patiently wait for You. For in these times we remember the story and out of deep darkness, You send a messenger to us, saying, "Behold I bring you good news of a great joy which will be to all the people, to every one of you. Behold I bring you good news of great joy." Dear Lord: Be patient with us as we patiently wait for You.
____________
1. Steven Covey, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1989), p. 154.
2. The complete quiz can be found on the Wichita, Kansas, Marriage Encounter web site, E-mail address: texan@southwind.net. For more information contact World Wide Marriage Encounter at 1-800-795-5683.
3. This is an adaptation of a story found on Dell Doughty's Internet Story Page (February 1997). Address: www.huntcol.edu/~ddoughty/fabula.html.
We go to such great effort to make this a festive, exciting, meaningful, and memorable time. We create festivals at the church and festivities in the home. Each family and friend plans for an idiosyncratic expression of love. We create a charged concoction mixing Santa and shepherds, kings, cards, cookies, and Christ. And when we have the household tachometer revved close to meltdown, we proclaim: "We'll just have to be patient! Christmas is not for another ten days. I know it's exciting, but getting all worked up into a lather won't make it come any quicker. So, just be patient!"
It's Hard To Be Patient
But it's hard to be patient. Recently, a call came to the church. A woman choked with emotion reported, "Ray walked away from Day Care this morning." Immediately I knew she meant her husband, who is sinking into Alzheimer's and is in a wonderful day program in a community center. "It's a very busy street. He's headed west; he knows we live that way. They spotted him at the bank and the hamburger stand. It's been six hours. I'd have called earlier but I knew there was nothing we could do. Every time someone sees him, he's gone before the police get there. It's such a cold day. Do you think we could start the prayer chain?" Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
A young couple wants one thing most in life --to have a child. They wonder why God has not chosen to bless them with a pregnancy. Both are successful professionals but this brings little satisfaction. Now their marriage is beginning to suffer under the strain. Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
A family with several children sits in a fast food restaurant, Happy Meals don't bring happiness. Children's meals are mixed up among them and while a haggard dad tries to sort out whose meal is whose, the littlest one eats part of a meal which does not belong to him. Tempers flare. Sometimes it's hard to be patient.
I've heard it said, although I'm not sure it's true -- it's hard to be patient with your spouse. Socrates wrote, "By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher ... and that is a good thing for any man." We've heard it said that marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. It has also been suggested that marriage is not a word -- it's a sentence; that marriages are made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning.
It's hard to be patient with our vocation. Certain credentials are required, then experience, then a measure of luck and perseverance. Someone not particularly deserving is promoted to the job we want, or we receive damaging and unfair criticism. "Sometimes I think I'll just give it up and go become a ______."
It's hard to be patient with our health: that long illness we did not anticipate, medical treatment which does not work out, conflicting opinions, escalating expenses, wear and tear on our loved ones.
It's hard to be patient with our exercise program. I want to be like Mike, but I don't have time to be in the gym four hours a day. I thought the video said that if I did Stepmaster, I would have firm thighs. I knew that when I started using my ab cruncher my tummy would be tender for a few days, but I think I pulled something. Maybe I should go the doctor. It's hard to be patient.
"Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength" (but when you're waiting and weary, it's hard to be patient). James writes, "Be patient, therefore, brethren until the coming of the Lord. Behold the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient over it until it receives the early and the late rain. You also be patient. Establish your hearts...." Establish your hearts. James instructs us to allow God to do what God does -- to send the early and the late rain -- and to wait upon what God will do, expecting precious fruit.
Steven Covey in his highly acclaimed Seven Habits of Highly Effective People discusses the productive practice of having a time of idea planting, growth and development, and harvesting. He recommends a focus on things which are "important," and resisting the dominance of the "urgent." Things which are important include such things as building relationships, exercising, writing a personal mission statement, long range planning, preventative maintenance, preparation -- "all those things we know we need to do, but somehow we seldom get around to doing because they aren't 'urgent.' "1 Establish the heart, James writes. Make plans, form intentions in normal times to establish the heart. If we are patient, if we wait on the Lord (and focus on the important) in the ordinary days, then in the demanding seasons of planting and harvesting and in the precarious time of storm and darkness we will have hearts prepared and established enough to persevere.
Sometimes it is hard to be patient as a parent. Count to ten, sit on the sofa with a child, and discuss what happened. What went wrong? Why was it dangerous? Give the child an alternative, go to another room, start a new activity and sometimes the best decision for a parent is simply to walk away. With a little thought, whatever it is may not seem to be that important.
Sometimes it is hard to be patient as a parent ... but patience isn't always hard. And when patience is richly available, parents can plan to lead gently. Make a plan ahead of time to lead our children gently so we will know what to do in the midst of our frustration, tiredness, disappointment, and confusion.
Sometimes it's hard to be patient in a marriage -- establish the heart when patience is richly available. Take the Marriage Encounter quiz.2 Answer each question yes or no. "My spouse and I never have any trouble communicating (yes or no). When I make my spouse angry, I always know why (yes or no). I always know when my spouse is interested in making love (yes?). My spouse and I always agree on child-rearing techniques (?). My spouse and I are perfectly matched as far as sexual needs and desires (?). Work, TV, sports, children, and family never interfere with my ability to talk with or be with my spouse (?)." Is it hard to be patient even with your spouse? Establish your heart when patience is richly available.
However, when patience is worn thin, we travel through an emotional black hole where the familiar seems strange. We stumble in our homes as if in darkened rooms with the furniture in disarray. James' voice whispers, "The Lord is coming soon." This is precisely the time when our hearts are greatly opened to his coming.
The ancient Jewish parable tells of Baal Shem-Tov, the great rabbi who loved his people. If he sensed his people were in danger, he would depart to a place in the woods near a great tree, light a special fire, and say a mysterious prayer. And always without exception, the people he loved would be saved from danger. Magid of Mezritch became leader after Baal Shem-Tov passed on. As his teacher before him, whenever Magid sensed a danger for the people, he would go to a place in the woods near a great tree. He would say, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to light the special fire, but I know the mysterious prayer. Please let that be good enough." And it was, and the people were always saved from danger. The Rabbi Moshe-leib of Sasov came to lead the people when Magid passed on. And each time he heard the people were in danger, he would go to the place in the woods near the great tree. He would say, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to make the special fire, I do not know the mysterious prayer, but I know the place in the woods near this great tree. Please let this be good enough." And it was and the people were always saved from danger. Rabbi Israel of Rizhyn came to lead the people when Rabbi Moshe passed on and whenever the people were in danger, he didn't even get out of his armchair. He shrugged his shoulders and could only bow his head and pray, "Dear Lord, I do not know how to make the special fire. I do not know the mysterious prayer. I cannot find my way to the place in the woods near the great tree. All I know is the story, please let this be good enough." And it was, and his people were always saved.3
Dear Lord, sometimes when we are greatly challenged, greatly in need, in deep darkness, we forget the special place in the woods and sometimes even to pray. Be patient with us, as we patiently wait for You. For in these times we remember the story and out of deep darkness, You send a messenger to us, saying, "Behold I bring you good news of a great joy which will be to all the people, to every one of you. Behold I bring you good news of great joy." Dear Lord: Be patient with us as we patiently wait for You.
____________
1. Steven Covey, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1989), p. 154.
2. The complete quiz can be found on the Wichita, Kansas, Marriage Encounter web site, E-mail address: texan@southwind.net. For more information contact World Wide Marriage Encounter at 1-800-795-5683.
3. This is an adaptation of a story found on Dell Doughty's Internet Story Page (February 1997). Address: www.huntcol.edu/~ddoughty/fabula.html.
