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Pao felt disconnected. Like he didn't belong. Like he didn't have a purpose. He had been struggling with his faith for a while and stopped going to church. He just couldn't bear the questions he had. The words he heard in church didn't make sense.

The pastor came to visit early one morning. It was a Saturday and Pao was on his way to wash the car. The pastor suggested they wash the car together in the driveway. Pastor asked how things were with Pao's wife and children, his job at the bank, and the weather. They lathered up the car.

There was an undercurrent of tension. Pao knew Pastor would ask why he hadn't been in church for several months. He was almost holding his breath. How should he answer Pastor? What was the real answer? Pao rinsed the car.

The car was shining as they worked in silence, each drying a side with circular motions. Birds were chirping in the trees and children were playing across the street. It was a peaceful moment. Pao was waiting for the question.

But the question never came. The car gleamed and Pastor laughed and jokingly suggested maybe next week they do Pastor's car. Pastor looked at his watch and mentioned he had to get some groceries. He thanked Pao for the "good workout" and told him to greet his wife and children. They parted with a warm handshake.

Pao stood in the driveway in silence as Pastor drove off, still holding an old towel. Pastor hadn't said anything about his absence in church. Did he even notice? Didn't Pastor want to know why Pao wasn't coming to church?

Pao thought about it the entire afternoon, wondering what he should say if Pastor came again next week and asked him to explain his absence. Pao just couldn't come up with an answer. It was as if church meant nothing to him other than words. It was as if Pao was watching the service through a tunnel.

Pastor did come the following week and this time he and Pao sat and chatted on the front porch. Pastor asked Pao if he could share something with Pao that happened to him when he was going to school.

Pastor had been away from home at college and didn't have time for church. He avoided going to his parents' home on Sundays, hoping his mother wouldn't invite him to church. She never did. But she did share her excitement about a particular Sunday school lesson she had taught to the children. She'd tell him about a speaker or workshop she had attended. Or she would share about a Bible study she had gone to.

Pastor recalled how excited she always was when she would talk about church. But Pastor didn't feel that way. He felt empty when he would sit in the back of the church, straining to see the minister preach, or the guest speaker speak.

Pastor became acquainted with a Christian woman at college who flatly announced that if he were serious about his intentions, he would have to go to church with her. Every Sunday. She loved church and it was through her excitement that Pastor went with her.

The preacher would engage the congregation, asking them questions and expecting an answer. Wow! Pastor had never seen that before. But the change of heart came one Sunday morning when that minister shared what a privilege it was to be a pastor, to be a part of a unit that was spread throughout the world. "We are one body, we share one God, we share all of life together."

At communion that morning, the minister introduced the elements with, "We share in the life and death of Jesus Christ and God the Father through the sacrament of communion, and because of that, we have communion with all of life. If we want to share in Christ's ministry we must become one with him and identify with him."

Those words hit Pastor like nothing else. Suddenly it was clear to him. He could be a part of a church that was connected to the whole Church, a worldwide community of believers, if only he would believe in Christ and be in communion with him. It was profound for him. It changed the way he looked at worship and church.

Pastor looked at Pao. "I recognize your look. You look just like I did twenty years ago. I want you to know that I have been praying for you and want you to know that you don't have to come back to church until you are ready. But when you do, I want you to acknowledge that you are a child of God, part of a larger kingdom, part of all Christendom."

Pastor left soon after but Pao thought about those words throughout the next week. And the next. And the following week he went to church and listened. It took several years for Pao's questions to be answered. He and Pastor talked several times. But the greatest honor for Pao was when Pastor asked Pao to be communion assistant. He felt Pao knew better than anyone what holy communion entailed.