God's Will
Illustration
Stories
I’m sorry but I have some bad news. John heard the words of the doctor again as he sat in the pew waiting for the service to start on Good Friday. He was at church because he was a regular and he hoped, he prayed that he could escape the rising fear and dread that had come from the medical appointment yesterday. The doctor had been sure there was no problem when John had told him the symptoms he was experiencing a couple of weeks ago. The doctor even told him to just ignore them as they were a sign of getting older. Johnwas uneasy and had been insistent that he wanted some tests just to be sure. Reluctantly, the doctor agreed, and John had undergone a couple of tests. A few days later, he got a call to come in and see the doctor.
The scans show that you have cancer in multiple places. John wiped at his eyes as the Good Friday service began. His mother and father had both died of cancer and images of them struggling for breath and in pain flashed before his eyes. He shook his head. He wasn’t that sick, but then neither were they when they were first diagnosed. Why was this happening? Where was God? How was he going to get through what was coming? God, why can’t you take this away from me? He stood as first hymn was sung, but honestly his mind was still reliving the pain and fear of hearing the news from the doctor.
“When Jesus had spoken these words...” the opening line from the gospel snapped John from his thoughts back to what was happening in the church. He knew the story of the passion and remembered that Jesus had prayed for what was happening to be taken from him. Yet this was the first time he actually heard those words and thought about what they meant. Jesus knew the pain and suffering that was coming and he dreaded it and wanted to avoid it. John could relate to that. He knew that there were days and weeks of treatment ahead of him. He wanted that future to just go away, to be different, for the burden to be taken from him. Yet he also knew that wasn’t going to happen.
John tilted his head. Jesus had ended his prayer by focusing on what God wanted and not his own desires. He decided to trust and rely on God instead of what he wanted to happen. John took a deep breath. The doctor had been hopeful that treatment would manage his cancer. He knew that things were different, there were better medicines and scans now than twenty years ago when his parents had cancer. He also knew that he wanted to see his kids grow up and hopefully to see grandchildren in his future. “What do I do, God?” he prayed softly and then John listened.
He listened as Peter denied Jesus and John realized it would be easy for him to rail and be angry at God and turn away looking for help and salvation somewhere else. He listened to the elders and scribes accusing Jesus with lies and falsehood and knew it would be tempting to deny he had cancer or to think it could be cured with some simple lifestyle change. He listened as Jesus was scorned and sent before Pilate and heard Pilate and Jesus speak of two very different kingdoms and ways. He listened to Jesus being condemned and dying on the cross. He could imagine those who mocked and rejected him and could hear the unhelpful things people would say to him when they learned he was sick.
As they stood to sing the final hymn, John’s future was still difficult and troubled. Yet John felt a peace that he hadn’t felt before. For John knew that he wasn’t going to face the stormy and chaotic times ahead by himself. He believed that there was love, there was grace, and there was hope even in the worst of times. Jesus had chosen to walk the road to calvary and had endured what was given to him. John believed in his heart that Jesus would not abandon or forsake him in the days to come. So as the hymn was finishing John whispered, “Not my will but yours, O God.”
John left the church thinking not of what the doctor had said to him and the prospect of the difficult days ahead, but rather of the waiting that happened between Good Friday and Easter. John smiled softly as he thought of what life would be like without any more worries about his health and he looked forward to that day. John walked toward his car thankful that he had gone to worship that morning and grateful that God had helped him to hear the good news again that day.
The scans show that you have cancer in multiple places. John wiped at his eyes as the Good Friday service began. His mother and father had both died of cancer and images of them struggling for breath and in pain flashed before his eyes. He shook his head. He wasn’t that sick, but then neither were they when they were first diagnosed. Why was this happening? Where was God? How was he going to get through what was coming? God, why can’t you take this away from me? He stood as first hymn was sung, but honestly his mind was still reliving the pain and fear of hearing the news from the doctor.
“When Jesus had spoken these words...” the opening line from the gospel snapped John from his thoughts back to what was happening in the church. He knew the story of the passion and remembered that Jesus had prayed for what was happening to be taken from him. Yet this was the first time he actually heard those words and thought about what they meant. Jesus knew the pain and suffering that was coming and he dreaded it and wanted to avoid it. John could relate to that. He knew that there were days and weeks of treatment ahead of him. He wanted that future to just go away, to be different, for the burden to be taken from him. Yet he also knew that wasn’t going to happen.
John tilted his head. Jesus had ended his prayer by focusing on what God wanted and not his own desires. He decided to trust and rely on God instead of what he wanted to happen. John took a deep breath. The doctor had been hopeful that treatment would manage his cancer. He knew that things were different, there were better medicines and scans now than twenty years ago when his parents had cancer. He also knew that he wanted to see his kids grow up and hopefully to see grandchildren in his future. “What do I do, God?” he prayed softly and then John listened.
He listened as Peter denied Jesus and John realized it would be easy for him to rail and be angry at God and turn away looking for help and salvation somewhere else. He listened to the elders and scribes accusing Jesus with lies and falsehood and knew it would be tempting to deny he had cancer or to think it could be cured with some simple lifestyle change. He listened as Jesus was scorned and sent before Pilate and heard Pilate and Jesus speak of two very different kingdoms and ways. He listened to Jesus being condemned and dying on the cross. He could imagine those who mocked and rejected him and could hear the unhelpful things people would say to him when they learned he was sick.
As they stood to sing the final hymn, John’s future was still difficult and troubled. Yet John felt a peace that he hadn’t felt before. For John knew that he wasn’t going to face the stormy and chaotic times ahead by himself. He believed that there was love, there was grace, and there was hope even in the worst of times. Jesus had chosen to walk the road to calvary and had endured what was given to him. John believed in his heart that Jesus would not abandon or forsake him in the days to come. So as the hymn was finishing John whispered, “Not my will but yours, O God.”
John left the church thinking not of what the doctor had said to him and the prospect of the difficult days ahead, but rather of the waiting that happened between Good Friday and Easter. John smiled softly as he thought of what life would be like without any more worries about his health and he looked forward to that day. John walked toward his car thankful that he had gone to worship that morning and grateful that God had helped him to hear the good news again that day.
