After years of keeping it...
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After years of keeping it a secret from herself, Jurene allowed herself to remember the incest. Uneasy about her intense anger, she wanted to leap to forgiveness. Her counselor stressed the difference between escaping anger and working to come out on its other side. Then, in her own time, she could put it behind her. That route, her guide said, might lead to forgiveness.
United Church of Christ pastor, Marie M. Fortune, tells us in Sexual Violence: The Unmentionable Sin that "an act of forgiveness cannot be hurried nor can it be orchestrated by those on the outside."
For Christians, forgiving is one means by which male and female victims let go of and disarm the power that the offense has over their lives: dominating it, making them feel bad about themselves, limiting their ability to love and trust others or letting their memory of the experience continue to victimize and control them.
Forgiveness can put the rape experience into perspective. " 'If I ever need to recall it, I know where it is, but I refuse to carry the pain any longer.' "
" 'Forgiving means acknowledging the humanness of the offender. But forgiving him never means condoning or excusing what he did. What he did is a distortion of who he was created to be and should never have happened.' "
(Marie M. Fortune, Sexual Violence: The Unmentionable Sin, Pilgrim Press, 1983, pp. 208-209).
--Brauninger
United Church of Christ pastor, Marie M. Fortune, tells us in Sexual Violence: The Unmentionable Sin that "an act of forgiveness cannot be hurried nor can it be orchestrated by those on the outside."
For Christians, forgiving is one means by which male and female victims let go of and disarm the power that the offense has over their lives: dominating it, making them feel bad about themselves, limiting their ability to love and trust others or letting their memory of the experience continue to victimize and control them.
Forgiveness can put the rape experience into perspective. " 'If I ever need to recall it, I know where it is, but I refuse to carry the pain any longer.' "
" 'Forgiving means acknowledging the humanness of the offender. But forgiving him never means condoning or excusing what he did. What he did is a distortion of who he was created to be and should never have happened.' "
(Marie M. Fortune, Sexual Violence: The Unmentionable Sin, Pilgrim Press, 1983, pp. 208-209).
--Brauninger
