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Luke stared at the stack of papers sitting in front of him. The last thing he wanted to do was close the Good Shepherd Ministry. He dreaded having to put out the press release saying that they were out of money and were no longer able to minister to the street people in the city. He knew that as soon as word got out all the people they had helped and the people in need would come looking for answers. He didn’t know what he was going to say to them. Truthfully, he didn’t know what to say.

“Hey neighbour,” Fran put a cup of coffee in front of him.

“Hey,” Luke looked up. “What’s this?”

“A dark blend from the place down the street.” Fran sat down across from him. “You looked like you could use it.”

“You heard then?”

“I guessed. I was over in my office dealing with a client when the Board of Directors filed out of here. From the looks on their faces I gather it didn’t go well. What happened?”

“They’re shutting us down.”

“I’m sorry,” Fran said.  “I know how much this ministry means to you.”

Luke sipped his coffee. “I thought I could make a difference.”

“I’m not around all the time but I thought you did make a make a difference.”

“I failed.” Luke shook his head. “I failed.”

Fran tilted her head. “How did you fail?”

“The ministry that was my dream, what I always wanted to do is now done. In the words of the Board of Directors it is ‘no longer viable’.”

“Again, I’m sorry.” Fran sipped her own coffee. “That must have been hard news to get.”

Luke nodded slowly. “I knew making this ministry work was going to be hard, but I thought I could make it work.”

Fran didn’t say anything.

Luke took a deep breath. “I guess I got over my head.”

“Anytime I popped over you seemed to be in crisis mode.”

“I was trying the best I could. I thought they would give me a little more time.”

“Why didn’t they?”

Luke picked up the financial report and handed it to her. “This is why.”

Fran looked over the numbers and whistled. “Yeah, I guess I can understand. If you were a client looking for advice, I would tell you to shut things down.”

“I know we needed money but I thought maybe a grant would tide us over.” Luke took the paper back. “We were turned down.”

“They saw your books?”

Luke nodded. “They said they couldn’t justify sinking money into this effort.”

“From a financial point of view, I can see that.”

“But this is a ministry. We were helping people who really have no where else to turn.” Luke paused and slumped back in his chair. “I guess it’s really over.”

“Yeah, I guess it is.”

“Fran,” Luke whispered. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“Just because this outreach isn’t going to continue doesn’t mean that there aren’t still people in need. Find another ministry to pursue.”

Luke shook his head. “I think I’m finished.”

Fran put down her coffee. “Why?”

Luke threw up his hands. “I’m a failure. I did what I was sure Jesus wanted and I ruined everything. I don’t have enough faith I guess.”

“Enough faith?” Fran frowned. “I wish I had half your faith. I mean you started Good Shepherd Ministry from nothing and ran a whole year reaching out into the streets with the good news. That takes a lot of faith.”

“But I failed. All of this was for nothing.”

Fran looked at her friend for a moment. “Do you remember the Bible story of Peter trying to walk on water?”

“Sure. Peter saw Jesus walking on the water, tried to do it himself and failed. He didn’t have enough faith.”

“When didn’t he have enough faith?”

Luke paused for a second to think. “When he saw the storm and his feet, he felt overwhelmed and he sank. That’s when he cried out to Jesus to save him.”

Fran nodded. “Which is when Jesus asks Peter why he doubted.”

“Yeah, that’s the story.”

“So let me ask you again. Did Peter not have enough faith when he failed to walk on water or did Peter not have enough faith when he cried out in fear as he was sinking? Was Jesus talking about his doubt at failing to do something he’d never done before or his doubt that Jesus would save him?”

Luke opened his mouth and closed it. He thought for a few minutes as Fran sipped her coffee.

“So in other words I should trust in Jesus to save me even when I am sinking because of my own failure.”

“Exactly. If you believe Jesus can save you why do you look to your failure instead of what he can do for you?” Fran looked at her watch. “Still want that drive home?”

Luke nodded and his friend went back to her office. He looked at the pile of papers again and took a deep breath. He started to pray. “Lord Jesus, the storms are raging around me...”